Friday, December 13, 2013

the one with friday's four [on friday the 13th]

[one] So today is Friday the 13th. I think my string of bad luck happened on Tuesday. I smashed my finger in the door and it hurt like hell. To the point I had to eat a little debbies and drink a coke because I felt like I did that time at Sigma Chi Blood drive in college when the nurse was slapping me in the face and proclaimed "We are losing him, WE ARE LOSING HIM!!!" I could hear and feel everything, I was just so damn nauseated because my last three meals had consisted of beer and whiskey. So I had to sit down and "come to" as the nurse said. I was also pulled over for speeding on my way to work. I was running late and told the officer that and he said "If I would have known it was you, I wouldn't have pulled you over..." because that's how we roll in small town Arkansas...and I am kind of a big deal...And that's when the cleaners couldn't do my pants. BAD DAY.

[two] Guess who is Hosting SNL on December 21?? JIMMY FALLON....and you think that's good news just wait until you hear the music guest....JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE! This will be the best episode in SNL history, hands down. And on top of those awesome stars, it's the Christmas episode that is always littered with previous cast members. I am hoping for the likes of Target Lady, Stefan, Debbie Downer, and Andy Samberg for D*ck in a Box.

[three] Wednesday was Ashley's 40th [read my post for her HERE] and we had a little get together that lasted WAY too late for a school night--especially the night before I have early morning bus dudt outside and it's 23 degrees. When my alarm went off this morning, I was certain I was dreaming. I am sure that I smell like The Electric Cowboy. I had a date with the turlet this morning in the teacher's lounge and that's always fun...And I am starting again today because it's Shea's wedding weekend! I am so excited. I have written a really good toast that I will post next week...

[four] I sent out my Christmas cards Wednesday, so everyone should have them by today. And if you don't get one, I am sorry. I thought I ordered 100, but I only ordered 75. But I think I got all the cool folks. Here is what they look like:

The inside reads:

2013 has passed by at record pace,
while I am working on buying a house, I am in the same place.
I didn't travel much because of my new business venture,
NATURALLY STATED is the name of this time consuming adventure.
Mom and I went to New York during my fall break,
where we shopped til we dropped and ate too many cupcakes.
I am still teaching kids but not sure how much they learn,
I know one thing is for sure: enough dollars aren't earned.
I made a huge mistake when I decided to buy a car,
I traded at 900 miles [and lost a chunk]--I know bizarre.
Here's to 2013 coming to an end,
Hope your year has been great, MERRY CHRISTMAS my friends!

*I accidentally submitted the wrong "saved design" and so my actual card had some typos and missing punctuation...oh well..

until next time...


  1. That card is awesome... love the poem!

  2. This SNL is going to be the best. I made sure to DVR it as soon as I heard Jimmy and JT were going to be on there. And I lol'd at you smelling like The Electric Cowboy, haha.

  3. ....I dated a Sigma Chi in college now refer to "worst Christmas present" answer in my link up.